Thank you for your question. I appreciate greatly your sensitivity in this difficult situation. Having given your heart to your wife years ago, having been hurt and subsequently having given your heart to another woman only to be confronted with duty brings tremendous confusion and often great heartache.
Clearly those who are believers in Jesus Christ, who share the intimacy of a relationship with Him know the joy that comes from "seeking first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness." Consequently, you turn to the Scriptures first. Inasmuch as you felt the need to ask the question, I presume that you suspect what the Bible teaches on this subject. The most pointedly relevant passage is from 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 which gives the intention of God for all believers: "But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband (but if she does leave, she must remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not divorce his wife."
The point of this passage is that neither the husband or the wife has the right to remarry - God expects both to remain committed to the original covenant as long as any possibility (however minute it may be) that reconciliation is possible. Notice in this passage that the husband is expected by God to remain available for reconciliation. The only occasion when a divorced spouse is free to remarry is when the other party has severed the covenant, not by departure (or even adultery) but by remarriage. If she had remarried, you would be free in the eyes of God to remarry in righteousness. However, if you remarry first, you become the party who abandons your marital covenant and destroyed any possibility for reconciliation. Deuteronomy 24:1-4 clearly stipulates the only Biblical recognition of the destruction of the covenant - remarriage.
I trust that this answers your questions. Truly, the will of the Lord is always that original spouses reconcile whatever the situation -- the only exception being when a remarriage has occurred, then they are forbidden to ever reconcile.